How to rekindle your sex life after a baby for dads: 2

When you and your partner have your first baby, it's supposed to bring you closer in every way. But what happens if your partner stops wanting to have sex now she's a mom? BabyCenter dads have asked for advice on getting the intimacy back into their relationships with their wives. New moms' (and dads') responses were very enlightening -- here they are.

"Have you tried talking to her about it? Perhaps she is feeling strange about it herself and needs a heart to heart. Pick your moment and try to mention it in a casual way. Perhaps there is more to it - like her self perception?"

Find out how she's feeling

-- Karen 

"I know that after a good heart to heart, me and my DH were both feeling misunderstood. I didn't see how sex could be so important when I was tired and hormonal and the baby was in the crib next door, while he felt a little neglected as if I cared for the baby more than him. After a good long chat, we both felt much better. Things didn't change overnight, but we felt that we understood each other. Keep talking, and let her know in lots of ways that she is special.

-- Littleblue 

"I know how you are feeling - you're feeling rejected and unloved. But stick with it, and most of all talk to her about it. She may burst into tears but that's good if she just needs to release some stress. And definitely get away for a 'dirty weekend'!"

-- Ian 

"Have you tried talking to her? She may be frustrated by it herself, and going through a lot? Finding ways together to overcome the problem, and planning some quality time sounds like a good idea to me."

-- Ruthy 

"My first piece of advice to you, if you haven't done it already, is sit down and talk to your wife. I'm sure she's more than aware of the drop in your 'activities'. There are all sorts of possible reasons why she's not wanting sex so often, but until you talk to her about it then you're just guessing as to the reason why and it's therefore difficult to fix. First of all, many women's libidos drop dramatically after having a child (hormones), plus there's the added factor of just being completely exhausted. She might also feel resentful that you're making demands on her already depleted energies. She may also feel upset at how pregnancy has changed her body and feel that she is not as attractive as she used to be. Whatever the reason, I do think it's important not to put too much pressure on her - the more you push the more she'll push you away. Let her know how much you love her, and how beautiful and sexy you find her, but at the same time tell her that you are aware of her feelings and reassure her that if you kiss or cuddle her it's not going to lead to sex unless she wants it to. If she feels that she can be more physically affectionate with you without it leading to more then the physical contact might increase and with a bit of luck will lead to some nookie! I think the most important thing is to talk about it, and be patient."

-- Lana's Mom

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How to rekindle your sex life after a baby for dads: 1

When you and your partner have your first baby, it's supposed to bring you closer in every way. But what happens if your partner stops wanting to have sex now she's a mom? BabyCenter dads have asked for advice on getting the intimacy back into their relationships with their wives. New moms' (and dads') responses were very enlightening -- here they are.

Possible reasons why she's rejecting you

"I've been there -- speaking from the woman's point of view. She's just lost sight of being a woman and is focusing on being a mom -- it's possible for her to be both. I would suggest you choose one night a week to go out -- just the two of you. The thing to not lose sight of is that you and your wife are together forever and when the kids move out you still need to be a strong couple romantically. Weekly dates are a great way to just have husband and wife time, without the kids. My husband and I have three kids, and dates, e-mails and exciting phone calls help keep us romantic."

-- Michelle 

"I had our son nine months ago and stopped breastfeeding a month ago, only now am I starting to feel somewhat 'normal' in that way again. I also felt (and still do) extremely self conscious of and uncomfortable in my new-shaped body. I dreaded my partner's attentions and felt very tense whenever he made any suggestions/approaches. I did also go through a patch of resenting having to reassure my husband that things would get back to normal while at the same time I felt pressured and worried myself. I don't have any solution as such, just time and patience."

-- Fee 

"I know how she feels, and my husband knows how you feel. Do take a weekend away, but convince your wife that it's not going to be all about trying to get her into bed. If you can genuinely say you just want to 'make believe' you are courting again, that you will not make any advances unless she takes the lead (as us women often feel like we have no control or right to our bodies once we have a baby, and feel very violated by it) it may just lead her to a place that makes her feel safe and loved enough to feel like making love again. I tried having sex with my husband at about 12 weeks and I eventually got past my own inhibitions, but the next morning I felt dreadful. From when I fell pregnant right through to now, where my son is three months old, the thought of my husband touching me makes me want to run and hide. It took me nine months to accept that my body was now a life creator and sustainer. My husband wanted my body to still be a pleasure giver and receiver and I just couldn't do both...I just can't handle my husband wanting me to switch from mother to lover." 

"My husband doesn't find it a problem to make love to me if the baby's asleep in our room, but I cringe at the thought that if the baby wakes during or after we've made love, he's going to need my body, yet it's just been 'used' for sex. Those two components put together in my mind make me feel sick. Maybe your wife feels like that." 

"I know it's hard being a daddy, but it's even harder being a mommy and a wife."

-- Yvette 

"It's hard having a baby, your body changes so much. Maybe your wife just doesn't feel sexy anymore -- that happens a lot. Revert to when you first started seeing each other. Go out on a date, take your time and just enjoy each other's company. Believe me, you showing such interest in her will make her want to rip your clothes off again. Take it slow and you will enjoy yourselves again, trust me."

-- Netti 

"You're not alone; my wife has been like that for nearly four years now. Only once or twice has she really been in the mood in all that time. Doctors have put it down to being post-natal. But I am gradually seeing some changes for the better."

-- Anon 

"I am a mom of an eight-month-old baby, and my interest in sex has pretty much gone down the toilet as well. I am hoping it will get better soon, as I actually feel guilty that I don't have as much interest as I did before. I feel bad when my husband looks rejected when I say no all the time, but I just can't get into it. I guess what I am trying to say is - it is not about you. This is something your wife has to get over, and I hope for your sake that she does. Just try to be patient a little while longer - I know it's hard (no pun intended)!"

-- Pippy 

"Do you do your fair share of housework and childcare? If not, maybe she feels undervalued and exhausted? If she feels that she is regarded as 'just' a wife and mother, understandably she will be uncooperative, either consciously or otherwise. If this is not the problem, then it might be her body image that's the problem. Is she still overweight following the birth? Why not sit down and ask her? If you love each other then this can be sorted out. Good luck."

-- RD 

"We have two babes 15 months apart in age. And I know that if I've been running round after them all day and my partner comes home, kicks his shoes off and watches TV (like we both used to in the evening), I feel a little taken for granted as I still have a million things to do. Honestly, you'd be amazed how attractive a helpful-around-the-house man is! Especially when he makes me a cup of tea when he gets home from work, too." 

"With our first baby it took a long time to heal as well, so maybe your wife had some pain and is worried that it hasn't come right again. Try telling her you won't even suggest sex for a certain time period and just flirt with her. Then she might relax enough to know that you like her the way she is. Personally I've never so felt so uncomfortable about the way my body looks and it's embarrassing to me. The mom job is very hard work and can be lonely and thankless, no matter how much you love your children. You get lost in the piles of laundry sometimes. I hope you work it out."

Sex After Giving Birth

Most people have heard of the "six week rule" about resuming sexual relations after giving birth. This rule implies that after six weeks post-partum, the couple's sex life will be back to where it was before the pregnancy. Not so simple!

Mention the "s" word to any group of new mothers with babies less than a year old, and a collective groan rises up. Why is sex such a problem after babies? There are many reasons, and it is important that new parents are aware of the dynamics that can affect their relationship and sex life, and how to problem solve around them. Most couples have struggles around the sexual aspect of their relationship at various stages. For many couples, a new baby triggers the first stress and confusion in their relationship and sex life.

According to Dr. John Gottman, a social psychologist and researcher at the University of Washington in Seattle, 67 per cent of couples experience a significant drop in marital satisfaction after their first child is born, and experience eight times more conflict in their relationship. Similar studies done by Cowen and Cowen at the University of California over a 10-year period revealed that 92 per cent of couples have an increase in marital conflict and disagreement after their first baby is born.

Sex and intimacy is a major component of the couple relationship, but for a variety of reasons, resuming a fulfilling sex life after the birth of a baby is a challenge for many couples. Post-partum women often state that for them, having sex is just one more chore on the list. After childbirth most women find that it takes a lot of work and more time to summon up sensual feelings. A new father may find it hard to understand why mom doesn't have the same desire that she once had. After all, it has been six weeks or more since she gave birth!  This situation often leads to feelings of guilt, disappointment and resentment between the partners. What I describe below is representative of what new parents often encounter as they try to make sense of their sexual relationship after baby comes on the scene.

How New Mothers Feel

For many women, giving birth was a fulfilling and completing experience. For others, the birth experience may have been emotionally or physically traumatizing. The physical and psychological adjustment after birth takes time, and many aspects of this adjustment affect a woman's desire and ability to feel sexual. As one new mother put it, "Every erogenous zone in my body hurt. Just the thought of sex was absolutely traumatic." Yet another said, "All those sexual parts of your body are being used in a very different way, first to give birth, and then to breastfeed. It makes you think very differently about sex for a while."

Breastfeeding affects a woman's sexual desire because this is the way nature planned it! The hormones of lactation suppress sexual desire and protect the mother from becoming pregnant again too soon. Often breastfeeding mothers also experience vaginal dryness because of lowered estrogen levels so a vaginal lubricant may be required. It is important to remember that breastfeeding is not a reliable method of birth control!

Mothers have constant, close physical contact with their infants, especially when breastfeeding. The mother's need for close human contact is often met by the baby, and she may not need as much from her partner. Many mothers report being "touched out" after carrying, feeding and giving to their baby all day. They want to say "please don't touch me—I want to be left alone, I have nothing more to give right now." This is definitely not good news for the partner who would like to have some physical closeness. As one mother put it, "Once the breastfeeding stops it gets easier, but for a while you feel like your body is being used and used and used and you just want a little private time. It's a wonderful luxury just to be left alone." Breastfeeding women tend to view their body as a mother's body more than a lover's body. Often the question arises, "Whose breasts are they anyway, the mother's, the baby's or the partner's?"

How a woman views her body during pregnancy and after birth will have a significant influence on how she feels sexually. Extra weight and flabby tone are the most common complaints. Lingering soreness in the vaginal area can continue for many months, and recovery from cesarean birth varies from woman to woman. This is a time to be kind to your body in what you ask of it, and how you judge it. A woman's body is forever changed after childbirth and it can take some time to get used to these changes and accept the new you.

Two women out of every 10 will experience some degree of postpartum depression. Any woman suffering from postpartum anxiety or depression needs specific treatment. It is also important to know that depression may not show up until several months after the baby's birth. Getting help to deal with the depression or anxiety is essential before a couple can work on their relationship and sex life.

Fatigue, sleep deprivation, and the challenges and new responsibilities of parenting definitely effect how carefree and spontaneous a new mother feels, especially when it comes to sex!

How New Fathers Feel

New fathers may be just as exhausted as new mothers, and they have their own set of new worries and responsibilities. Many men are overwhelmed with concerns about supporting a growing family and securing their financial future. If a man has been used to being his partner's first priority it comes as a rude shock to realize that the baby has nudged him out of first place.

If there were sexual problems during the pregnancy, the arrival of the baby may compound them. Some men find it difficult to appreciate the feeding function of the breasts, especially in a society where the breasts have been idealized for their sexual attraction. It can be traumatic for some men to have witnessed their partners' body going through the birth process. This can have a profound effect on a man's ability to feel sexual with his partner.

Some new fathers find that parenthood strengthens their feelings of love and sexual desire for their mate. Parenting the baby together is an intimate and rewarding experience for both partners. As time goes by, it is important to not let the couple relationship get lost in this exciting new role. The patterns that develop during the early years can be hard to break, and parents sometimes find that the child, not their relationship, remains the focus of their lives. This is especially true where sleeping arrangements are concerned. It is common to have a young baby in the parents' bed in the beginning. It is also common for one of the partners to eventually leave the bed to facilitate a better night's sleep for everyone. For many couples, a continued interruption of bedroom intimacy puts a strain on the relationship. Even the presence of the baby in the parents' bedroom can be a big distraction from intimacy as the little grunts and squeaks of the baby seem to occur at just the wrong moment!

What Can We Do?

The first step in re-establishing a meaningful sexual relationship after the birth of a baby is to acknowledge that there is a problem. No family will likely experience all of the dynamics discussed above but it is fairly typical to encounter some issues around sex and intimacy after childbirth. Couples can start to re-establish their sexual relationship by identifying where they need to make some changes and by communicating their needs and feelings to each other.

Give your partner a big hug and kiss this Valentine's Day!

Infant Obesity and Healthy Eating Habits

It is probably never too early to think about childhood obesity, but in a younger infant or toddler, you should concentrate more on what she is eating and drinking and not so much on what her weight is.

Even if she was gaining too much weight, if she had a healthy diet and wasn't drinking too much juice or formula, then I wouldn't worry about it too much at this age. Many bigger infants and younger toddlers 'thin out' as they begin to walk and run around and become more active. So I would continue to concentrate on encouraging healthy eating habits, such as:

• continuing to breastfeed or feed an iron fortified infant formula (with an average of 24-32 ounces a day)
• limiting juice to only 4-6 ounces of 100% fruit juice and avoid fruit drinks and soda
• offering a variety of foods, including a lot of different fruits and vegetables to encourage good eating habits later
• limiting the 'tasty treats' that have a lot of added sugar or that are high in fat and instead concentrate on healthy treats that also taste good

By the way, your child's growth looks fine. She was average at birth, moved to the top of the charts at 4 months, and is now down to the 75th percentile for her weight. If you consider that her height is off the growth charts, then she is definately not overweight.

And if you look at the growth charts, you can see that most infants who are following a growth curve actually double their birth weight closer to five or six months. If they gained weight much more than that, it would be a good idea to review your infant's feeding patterns with your Pediatrician to make sure that you weren't overfeeding her. But with a normal diet and a healthy infant, gaining weight a little more quickly than average is probably normal for a younger infant. You would probably do more harm than good by putting a baby on a 'diet' and trying to limit their intake of breastmilk or formula at this age.

Still, if a baby doubled her birth weight at three or four months because you were already feeding them a lot of cereal, giving them more than 32 to 40 ounces of formula, or already giving juice, then that might not be healthy and you might need to discuss more healthy eating habits with your doctor.

How to Get Free Formula

Most formula companies are eager to get new parents' loyalty, so they offer samples of their formula and ongoing coupons. The coupons they offer are usually of high dollar value, and they send them frequently. As a new parent on a tight budget, you can take advantage of all these offers and receive a sizable amount of formula for free. Trying several different brands will also help you decide which brand you want to purchase once you've used all your free formula.

Instructions

1

Go to the Mead Johnson Enfamil website and sign up for Enfamil's Family Beginnings program (see Resources below). You'll receive formula samples, feeding advice and information and coupons, and you'll be put on their mailing list to receive regular coupons and information about feeding.

2

Go to the Similac website and sign up for Similac's Strong Mom Program (see Resources below). Much like Enfamil, you'll receive free samples, coupons and information about feeding.

3

Go to the Carnation website and sign up for Carnations' Very Best Baby Program (see Resources below). If you are expecting twins, you can send copies of your twins' birth certificates, and you will receive six cans of formula.

4

Go to the Parent's Choice website and fill out a request form to receive a free formula sample (see Resources). Parent's Choice is Wal-Mart's store-brand formula. You'll receive a pouch with enough powder formula to make a full day's worth of bottles.

5

Go to the Member's Mark website and fill out a request form to receive a free formula sample (see Resources). Member's Mark is Sam's Club's store-brand formula. You'll receive a pouch with enough powder formula to make a full day's worth of bottles.

6

Ask if your doctor has any free formula samples. Participating doctors receive free samples from the formula companies to hand out to soon to-be-parents.

7

Ask a nurse while you are in the hospital for a new mother pack from the formula companies. Enfamil, Similac and Carnation all provide free diaper bags filled with coupons, samples and other goodies for new moms. Which one you receive depends on the hospital.

Tips & Warnings

• If your hospital offers diaper bags from more then one formula company, don't be afraid to ask for one of each. Consider it comparison shopping
• Nature's One, a formula company, offers its own mail-in rebate program. For each set of 25 proofs of purchase you'll receive two free units of formula. For more information on their products, visit their website.
• Most of the formula companies only allow one free formula request per household.

How to Care for an Overweight Baby

There is no doubt that chubby babies are the picture of cuteness. Yet, many parents wonder how chubby is too chubby. Too much weight gain in the first four months may lead to weight problems later in life. Also, a baby who is too plump to move around gets pulled into an unhealthy cycle. Because she is too chubby to move, she gains more weight. This makes it even more difficult for her to be active. When dealing with a baby who weighs too much, the goal is not to get the baby to lose weight. The goal is to slow down her future weight gain.

Instructions

1

Avoid using feeding to meet any of your baby's needs except hunger. Only feed your baby when he is hungry. If you feed your baby when she is sleepy, bored or unhappy, she will become accustomed to eating for the wrong reasons. Whenever she begins to cry, don't automatically assume that she is hungry. Try hugging or playing with her. She may also be trying to tell you that she is sleepy and ready for her nap.

2

Talk with your doctor about making dietary adjustments. If you baby weighs too much, your doctor may recommend switching to a lower calorie formula.

3

Use water. This can be appropriate for older babies. If your baby is comforted by sucking, giving him a bottle of water will satisfy this need without extra calories.

4

Avoid giving your baby solids too early. A new baby's digestive system is not capable of handling solids too early. Introducing solid foods before it is appropriate can lead to excessive weigh gain.

5

Examine your baby's diet. If your baby is eating solids regularly and is still eating the same amount of formula or breast milk as before, this may responsible for the excessive weight gain. Talk with you doctor about cutting back on solid foods. Remember that it isn't recommended for a baby to begin with solid foods until closer to six months of age.

6

Encourage your baby to be active. Move his legs when you change his diaper. Let him have supervised playtime on his tummy. Talk and play with him so that he attempts to interact with you.

Tips & Warnings

Before doing anything about your baby's weight, be sure to check with your doctor. Babies do not have much muscle, and it is normal for them to be rounded.

A child who is overweight through the age of four is more likely to be overweight as an adult

Do not add cereals to your baby's bottle. She will eat too much that way.

Feeding babies solids too early may make fat toddlers

Feeding a baby solid foods too early in life may increase his risk of becoming obese before reaching preschool, according to a new study in Pediatrics.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that new mothers breast-feed their babies for at least six months and introduce solid foods between 4 and 6 months. This new study finds that among formula-fed babies, those who were given solid foods before age 4 months had a higher risk of becoming obese.

The study compared obesity rates among 847 3-year-olds. Researchers found that among children who were breast-fed for at least four months, the timing of solid-food introduction did not affect their odds of becoming obese at age 3. But among babies who were formula fed or who stopped breast-feeding before the age of 4 months, introducing solid food before 4 months was linked to a sixfold increase in the odds of that child becoming obese by age 3.

"Our data support the existing American Academy of Pediatric Guidelines that suggest waiting until an infant is at least 4 months old before introducing solids. And what our study suggests is that increasing adherence to those guidelines across the U.S. population has the potential to reduce the risk of obesity in childhood," says study author Dr. Susanna Huh with Children's Hospital Boston.

The more moms work, the heavier kids get

Researchers aren't exactly sure why introducing solids early may be linked to obesity. Their best guess is that formula-fed infants are consuming more milk than breast-fed children and therefore getting more calories.

But Dr. Frank Greer, former chairperson of the AAP Committee on Nutrition, is puzzled by the fact that the researchers didn't find an increase in weight gain in the children who were introduced to solids early.

"They didn't show that there was any increase in rate of growth in the formula-fed babies before that {age 3}. It makes me wonder if this is just a marker for people that introduced solid foods between 2 – 4 months, that their overall diet is poor in general," suggests Greer.

Poor eating may have led to the weight gain by age 3, the doctor theorizes,  not the timing of the introduction of solids into the diets of babies.

More research may offer clarification, but in the meantime, it's important to remember to breast-feed your infant as long as possible and to introduce solids later rather than sooner.

How Often and How Much Should Your Baby Eat?

Breastfed babies generally eat more frequently than those who are formula fed. Newborns usually nurse on their mothers' breasts every 2 to 3 hours; as they become older, the time between feedings will increase as the capacity of their stomachs becomes larger. By contrast, formula-fed newborns will start out by eating approximately every 3 to 4 hours during the first few weeks of life.

When you hold your baby to feed her a bottle, watch for cues that she is full, instead of using the clock as a guide. It's more important that you are attentive to clues or signals from your baby that indicate she's hungry. These are called hunger cues. When she wants to eat, she may become more alert, put her hands or fingers on or in her mouth, make sucking motions, stick out her tongue, smack her lips, kick or squirm, or begin rooting (moving her jaw and mouth or head in search of your breast). If she begins crying, this is usually a late signal that she wants to eat.

Whether breastfeeding or formula feeding, most parents worry about whether their babies are getting enough to eat. Because babies suck not only for hunger, but also for comfort, this can be hard to know at first. Even when babies no longer act hungry, some parents worry about whether all of their nutritional needs are being met.

Again, don't panic. Your baby will let you know when she's had enough or wants more. In most cases, she'll consume about 90% of the available breast milk during the first 10 minutes of feeding on each breast. Then she might move away from the breast or simply doze off. Among the many advantages of breastfeeding is that it tends to be cued or on-demand feeding, meaning that in a sense, your baby will take charge of her own feedings. If you watch your baby's responses, you should be able to figure out when she's full. She may turn her head or give other signals that she's no longer interested in eating. The formula-fed baby will also let you know when she's had enough. You might notice her becoming distracted while drinking from the bottle, or she might start fidgeting or turn her head. She may close her mouth tightly. As your baby gets a little older and her eye-to-hand coordination gets better, she might try to knock the bottle or spoon out of your grip.

On the other hand, if your baby finishes a bottle and starts smacking her lips or begins to cry, she probably wants more. On average, by the end of the first month, she should be taking in at least 4 ounces of formula per feeding. At 6 months of age, she'll be consuming 6 to 8 ounces per feeding.

You can also rely on your baby's diapers to give you clues on whether she's getting enough to eat. In the first month of your newborn's life, she should wet her diaper 6 or more times a day and have 3 to 4 (often more) bowel movements each day. Your baby should also appear satisfied for a couple of hours after each feeding if she's consuming adequate amounts of food.

What if your baby almost always seems to be hungry—or what if she doesn't appear to have the appetite that you think she should? If that's the case, talk to your pediatrician. The doctor will be able to answer specific questions or respond to your concerns about whether your baby is getting enough nourishment and is growing normally. During each office visit, the pediatrician is already keeping track of your baby's weight gain and monitoring whether her weight is continuing to increase steadily. For instance,

• From months 1 through 4 of life, your baby should gain about 1 1⁄2 to 2 pounds each month, while growing about 1 to 1 1⁄2 inches.
• Between 4 and 7 months of age, she'll add another 1 to 1 1⁄2 pounds per month and grow about 2 to 3 inches in length.
• By 8 months, the average boy will weigh between 14 1⁄2 and 17 1⁄2 pounds, while girls will probably weigh about a halfpound less.
• At 1 year of age, the typical child weighs about 3 times her birth weight.
• Breastfed babies tend to be chubbier than formula-fed babies during the first 4 to 6 months of life. Then they usually become leaner than formula-fed babies by 9 months to 1 year of age.

Introducing Solid Foods to Infants

Quick Facts...

• Mother's milk or an iron-fortified formula supplies all the nutrients a baby needs during the first six months.
• An infant's developmental readiness should determine when to feed solid foods.
• Introduce single-ingredient foods one at a time at weekly intervals.
• Avoid sweetened foods because they can promote tooth decay and may cause a preference for sweets.

The introduction of semisolid and solid foods to an infant's diet has changed since 1920, when these foods were seldom offered before 12 months. During the 1960s and 1970s, solid foods often were fed to infants in the first three months and viewed as a milestone achievement. Many people also believe that feeding solid foods (such as cereal) before four months will make an infant sleep through the night. This is not true.

Many pediatric health care professionals were concerned that an early introduction of solid foods increases the risk of overfeeding and food allergies. An infant's developmental readiness should determine when to feed semisolid foods. In fact, breast milk or iron-fortified formula supplies all the nutrition an infant needs in the first few months.

When to Start

The child's age, appetite and growth rate are factors that help determine when to feed solid foods. Before feeding solid foods, the baby should be able to:

• swallow and digest solid foods,
• sit with support and have neck and head control, and
• close their lips over a spoon.

Semisolid foods and juices are a significant change and should not be started until four to six months. This age usually coincides with the neuro-muscular development necessary to eat solid foods.

Introduce single-ingredient foods one at a time at weekly intervals. This process helps identify any food sensitivities the child might have. The sequence of new foods is not critical, but rice cereal mixed with breastmilk or formula is a good first choice. Add vegetables, fruits and meats to the infant's diet one at a time. Serving mixed foods is not recommended in the beginning. (See Table 1.)

Food can be homemade or commercially prepared, depending on the mother's needs. Choose plain, strained fruit such as applesauce, peaches or mashed ripe bananas. Do not offer fruit desserts that contain unnecessary sugar. They provide unneeded calories and may cause a preference for sweets as the child gets older. Introduce juices when your baby learns to drink from a cup, around six to nine months. Dilute adult juices half and half with water or strain them before giving to a baby. Avoid sweet drinks; they can promote tooth decay.

To make baby food, boil the vegetables and fruits until tender. Cool. Blend until there are no lumps. If it is too thick, add breast milk, baby formula or a little water.

Remember:

• Begin with single-ingredient foods (such as rice cereal).
• Wait five days between new foods.
• Feed the baby when he or she is hungry, but do not overfeed.
• Make meal time a happy time.
• Never force your child to finish bottles or food. This can cause the baby to ignore what his or her body says and may lead to poor eating habits later. Watch for cues from your baby.

Starting Solids

• Offer new food when your baby is in a good mood, not too tired and not too hungry. Serve solids after the baby has had a little breast milk or formula.
• Hold the baby on your lap or use an infant seat or feeding chair if the baby can sit.
• Use a baby spoon and place a small amount (about 1/2 teaspoon) of food on the baby's tongue.
• Give the baby time to learn to swallow these foods and get used to the new tastes.
• Never use a bottle or other feeding device for semisolid food.
• Do not feed baby directly from the jar; use a clean dish. Heat only the amount baby will eat and throw leftovers away.
• Make meal time fun for your infant.

Table 1: Calendar for feeding your baby for the first year of life.
Foods	Birth	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	12 months
Breast milk or iron-fortified formula	Breast milk or formula				Continue breast milk or iron fortified formula								Start whole cow's milk from cup.
Cereals and grain products					Iron-fortified plain infant cereal (no fruit flavor or mixed grains). Start with rice, then oatmeal or barley.			Teething biscuits.		Mixed grain cereals. Noodles, rice. Bread and toast strips.
Vegetables							Strained, single vegetables			Cooked vegetables, mashed or chopped.		Sliced cooked vegetables for finger-feeding.
Fruit & fruit juices							Strained, single fruits.	Unsweetened fruit juices		Cooked, canned, or soft fresh fruits, mashed or chopped.		Sliced soft fruit for finger feeding.
Meat and other protein foods							Strained single meats. Pureed dried beans, peas. Plain yogurt.			Same foods, chopped or mashed. Cottage cheese, mashed egg yolk.		Same foods, bite-sized pieces for finger feeding. Creamy peanut butter.
Egg white and fish												Egg white. Tender, flaked boneless fish.
SPECIAL NOTE: Some foods may cause choking. Because of this, avoid raw carrots, nuts, seeds, raisins, grapes, popcorn and pieces of hot dogs during baby's first year.

Should Babies Eat Fish?

Sure, it's an untraditional baby food, but you'll be surprised by the brain-building goodness packed inside.

As a pediatrician and father of eight, I've realized how much children's health and behavior are affected--for better or worse--by what they eat. Of course, you already know how important a balanced diet full of whole grains, vegetables, fruit and lean proteins is, but one thing I always found missing from babies' diet was fish. Parents just didn't seem to think it--and other seafood--was a "baby" food.

Over the years, study after study has supported that omega-3 fatty acids--essential nutrients found in seafood--help promote infant brain development as well as boost immunity and vision. In fact, they're good for nearly every organ, even baby's super-soft skin. Even moms can benefit: The latest research shows that women who ate adequate amounts of omega-3s during pregnancy were less likely to experience postpartum depression. Read on for advice on introducing seafood into your child's diet.

Fish Talk
The lowdown on which seafood is tops--and why.

What types of fish are best for baby? Salmon is by far the best source of DHA*--the star of the omega-3 world. But almost all seafood contains omega-3s, so try to give your baby a variety of low-mercury fish.

How much fish should my baby eat? For babies just starting out on solids, I recommend about 2 ounces of wild salmon per week. After your baby is off formula or breast milk, give her 6 to 7 ounces per week. If you find it difficult to reach that amount, consider a supplement. Ask your doctor for a recommendation, or try my own DHA liquid.

Should pregnant and breastfeeding women eat more fish? I recommend that pregnant and lactating women eat 6 ounces of wild salmon twice a week. In addition, make sure you talk to your doctor about consuming at least 650 milligrams of DHA daily from prenatal supplements.

* WHAT'S DHA? You see it on formula labels, but did you know that it's also abundant in fish? DHA, short for docosahexaenoic acid, is an omega-3 essential fatty acid vital for brain and eye development

Fish Food
Doubtful your baby will eat fish? Offer it early on, and it just may become a favorite food. Start with salmon, and try these tips:

Don't stress it. Blend the salmon flakes into pasta or mashed potatoes. Another option: HappyBaby's frozen meal of wild salmon, lentils and sweet potatoes.

Spread it. Puree cooked wild salmon (canned or steamed fresh) with lemon, olive oil and seasonings and then spread it on bread or crackers.

Strip it down. Older babies might enjoy "fish fingers." Dip inch-wide strips of deboned salmon fillets into beaten egg and coat them with a mixture of whole-wheat flour, whole-wheat bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese and a dash of salt. Bake for about eight minutes.

Mercury Meter

Some seafood has too much methylmercury, a toxin that can affect the brain. Here's a checklist of safe, low-mercury fish you can give baby: canned light tuna, cod, catfish, pollock and salmon. Other safe seafood includes shrimp, clams, crab and scallops. 

Treatment of infant diarrhea

Treatment in infant diarrhea is to give your infant baby a lot of fluids to prevent dehydration. You can give your baby oral rehydration solution (ORS) to replace your infant body fluids that is lost during diarrhea. Follow the following diet plan for your baby during diarrhea.

Diet plan for babies suffering from diarrhea:

1. Strict oral rehydration solution like Pedialyte every 4-6 hours - this is the most important. Do not let your baby dehydrate. Some suggest it is very important to continue breastfeeding. Watch carefully how the baby reacts to milk and decide whether to temporarily stop feeding milk. Sometimes nothing stays in the stomach. We took our baby to the emergency room and they put him on IV fluids. He completely recovered quickly.

2. If you have started giving solids to your baby - You can give bland foods. Give them apple sauce, strained banana, saltines, strained carrots, strained squash, mashed potatoes(no additives), rice cereal and oat meal. You can give toast, crackers, breads, pretzels, rice, mashed potatoes(no additives), noodles(no additives), bananas, apple sauce, carrots, squash, rice krispies, cheerios, oatmeal and yogurt with active cultures.

4. No milk products - consult your pediatrician. Some babies may become lactose intolerant during this time.

5. No oils or butter

6. No spicy foods or sauces until the infant diarrhea subsides.

Diarrhea in infants

Our son, when he was one year old, got a severe case of diarrhea and it lasted for 3 days. We ended up going to the emergency room after he was completely dehydrated and it was a painful experience. He completely recovered after the doctors gave him intravenous fluids and we were in the hospital for 2 days. It is very hard to find a vein for injecting the IV fluids when the person is dehydrated and it was heart breaking to see the way the nurses had to find a vein. We learnt a lot during that experience and I am putting together this hub as a guide to deal with infant diarrhea and how to treat diarrhea in children. Some babies may become lactose intolerant during diarrhea and in these cases it is advisable to avoid any milk products. After recovery from diarrhea, our son had no problem drinking and digesting milk. Make sure to consult with your pediatrician before deciding to stop breastfeeding or to stop feeding milk. It is very important to feed the baby with fluids like pedialyte during diarrhea.

Call your pediatrician right away if:

1. Infants under 3 or 4 months old has diarrhea.

2. Diarrhea persists in infants for 3 days or longer.

3. Diarrhea stools containing blood or pus.

4. Your baby has fever and vomitting.

5. No urine in more than 6 hours.

Signs of dehydration

Dehydration in babies is a serious problem and you should always watch your baby from not getting dehydrated. Here are some signs that your your baby is dehydrated.

• Decreased urination: If your infant has no wet diapers for 4 to 5 hours. Fewer wet infant diapers than usual in a 24 hour period..
• Infant has dry eyes and crying with few tears or no tears.
• High fever
• Sunken abdomen, eyes and cheeks.
• Infant is less active than usual.
• Your baby is thristy
• Dry skin, dry mouth and tongue
• Fatigue

Possible causes of infant diarrhea

1. Bacterial infections: Several types of bacteria consumed through contaminated food and water can cause diarrhea. Common bacteria include Salmonella, Escherichia coli(E.coli), Campylobacter.

2. Many viruses cause infant diarrhea. Some of them are Rotavirus, Herpes simplex virus, Cyptomegalovirus. Rotavirus is the most common cause of acute diarrhea in babies and young children. It usually affects children between the ages of 6 months and 2 years. When children have rotavirus, their stools contain large numbers of germs. Rotavirus can spread easily. It could spread by coming in contact with an infected diaper and not washing hands properly afterward by touching a toy that has germs on it.

3. Parasites: Parasites can enter the body through foods and water and settle in the digestive system. Parasites that cause infant diarrhea include Giardia lamblia, Cryptosporidium and Entamoeba histolytica

4. Reaction to medicines: Antibiotics, blood pressure medications, antacids containing magnesium and cancer drugs can cause infant diarrhea

5. Bowel disorders: Infant diarrhea can be a symptom of irritable bowel syndrome.

6. Intestinal diseases like crohn's disease, infalmmatory bowel disease and celiac disease often lead to diarrhea.

7. Teething and change in mother's diet if the baby is breastfed.

How to Prevent Infant Diarrhea

Diarrhea in infants can be difficult to identify because for many babies, loose, frequent, and even watery stools may be normal, especially among breastfed infants. Infants suffering from diarrhea typically experience a sudden change in the frequency and texture of their stools. Diarrhea causes discomfort and can lead to infant dehydration. Diarrhea is usually caused by a virus, bacterial infection, food intolerance or allergy, or parasite. You can take a number of steps to prevent infant diarrhea.

 Steps

1. Wash hands frequently. All caregivers should practice diligent hand washing and you should also wash the infant's hands. Always wash hands after changing or adjusting diapers and before and after food preparation. This can help stop the spread of viruses and bacterial infections.

• Run warm water.
• Moisten hands, and rub with soap for at least 15 seconds.
• Rinse with warm water.

2. Keep home surfaces clean. Diarrhea is highly contagious. A person experiencing diarrhea could touch a surface that you or the baby may touch. You can easily spread diarrhea causing viruses or bacteria by touching your baby's face or mouth. Babies also like to put their fingers and hands into their mouths.

Disinfect kitchen counters and appliances, bathroom fixtures and changing areas daily.

Clean baby toys regularly. This is especially important if other children have touched the toys.

3. Make sure the baby receives the rotavirus vaccine. Rotavirus is the most common cause of severe diarrhea in babies and small children. A pediatrician's office will usually administer the multi-dose oral vaccine at 2, 4 and 6 months of age.

4. Cut down on the amount of juice the baby drinks. Juices can loosen stools and cause or worsen diarrhea. Infants should not drink more than 4 oz. (118.3 ml) of juice daily.

5.Follow directions carefully when mixing formula. If you mix infant formula with too much or not enough water, it can cause diarrhea in infants.

• Be precise when you measure how much formula and water to use.
• Double check the directions on the formula package if you switch brands or need to use a new formula temporarily to make sure you use the correct amount of water.

6. Add yogurt with live cultures to the baby's diet. You can feed infants over 6 months old dairy products made from whole milk, but you should not feed younger infants yogurt. The live cultures can help decrease the length and severity of a diarrheal episode.

7. Identify food intolerances or allergies. Diarrhea may occur if your baby has a reaction or intolerance to a specific food or foods.

• Introduce solid foods 1 at a time. Wait 3 days to see if the baby shows any adverse reactions.
• Note which foods the baby does not tolerate well or any foods that cause an allergic reaction in the baby. You can have a pediatrician or allergist follow up with allergy testing to confirm your observations.
• Stop feeding these foods to the baby.
• Cut trigger foods from your diet if you are a breastfeeding mother as allergens in your diet may affect the baby.

8. Limit the amount of coffee, cola, and herbal teas you drink if you are breastfeeding. These beverages are linked to diarrhea in babies.

Dos and Don’ts for Buying Baby Clothes for Infants

Shopping for baby's clothing is difficult for a first-time parent because they lack the knowledge of what fabric to pick for the baby. There are a couple of things that a parent must keep in mind when buying baby clothes such as the quality of the cloth, how comfortable the cloth is likely to be for the baby, if the clothing is comfortable enough for the parent to make the baby wear it, etc. For starters, here are some dos and don'ts to keep in mind when buying baby clothes.

• Do choose baby clothes that are easy to be put on. As the baby grows up, you will realise that changing his/her clothes takes more struggle. It will be even severe when trying to make your baby wear something at the age of one year when he/she would know how to crawl and wiggle. To make things easy, buy clothes that come with elastic waistbands, Velcro closures and snaps.
• Do choose fabric that is comfortable for your child. You must always not only look for baby clothes that are of good quality but are made of organic and hypoallergic materials.
• Do prefer buying clothes for your baby that are prewashed.  because prewashed cloth is less likely to shrink and is considered to be safer and more comfortable to wear. Besides, prewashed clothes will reduce your worry of washing or cleaning them.
• Do buy baby clothes that have snap closures at leg inseams as such clothes will make it easy for you to change the diaper whenever the baby soils it.

• Do not buy baby clothes that have zippers and buttons as these can accidently harm the baby's skin. Should you buy baby clothes with zippers, make sure they also have zipper guards.
• Do not opt for outfits with fancy embellishments that may cause an allergic reaction in the baby.
• Do not buy booties that keep coming off. In fact, you must not worry about putting shoes on your baby until he/she has been walking for a minimum of six weeks. Should you be tempted to keep the baby's feet clean, buy socks that are well-fitting and have non-skid material fit to the soles.
• Do not buy outfits because you want to dress your baby up fancy and show him/her off.

How to Choose Clothes for a Child

New parents usually receive a lot of clothes as gifts. Unfortunately, some of the more popular gift items aren't very useful to or popular with babies. If you receive items you don't need, try to exchange them for those you do need.

Knowing which clothes to buy for your child can be perplexing, not to mention the entire diapering question. In this article, we will answer all of your baby clothes questions over the following sections:

• Diapers Diapers play a major role in the first few years of a parent's life. New parents have probably never encountered a diaper before their baby and will likely have many questions. In this section, we will describe the various types of diapers and help parent's make an informed decision about which kind they want to use. First, we will explore the most popular choice -- the disposable diaper. Next, we will look a cloth diapers that can be laundered. Finally, we will warn you about some common diapering hazards.
• Infant Clothing  Infant clothing can be an unrewarding investment because your child will grow out of them so quickly. On this page, we will help you balance the need for comfortable, safe clothes, with the reality that they will obsolete in a matter of weeks. We will help you choose socks, underwear, sleepwear, hats, sweaters, snowsuits, and blankets.
• Toddler Clothing Once your child begins to crawl or walk, their clothing needs will rapidly change. Also around this time, your child might start toilet training, which brings another set of considerations. On this page, we will help you choose clothing from the first through the third year. We will examine daywear and sleepwear as well as what makes an outfit right for you child. Finally, we will explore shoes and how to buy footwear for you child.

How to buy Baby clothes for the first six weeks

A little preparation goes a long way when shopping or registering for baby clothes. You'll be changing your baby's clothing several times a day – babies can be messy! – so make sure outfits are uncomplicated and open easily for diaper changes. In general, you want soft, comfortable clothing with no irritating tags or seams.

A note on sizing: It's hard to predict which size clothing your baby will need at first. Many babies outgrow newborn or 0- to 3-month clothes quickly, and some larger babies skip the newborn sizes completely and start with 3-month or 3- to 6-month sizes. Others will start out in preemie sizes and wear newborn clothes for months. The best tip is to buy clothing in several sizes and return what you don't use. 

How many of each item you'll need will depend on how often you plan to do laundry, but we've provided rough guidelines below (in parentheses). Make sure to also read Baby and mom gear for the first six weeks to help you shop for other newborn essentials.

Clothing to buy for your newborn

• One-piece outfits (5 to 7): Some of these are basically spiffed-up jammies appropriate for sleeping and playing – and because babies nap so frequently, especially at first, these are very convenient. 
• Shirts (4 to 7): Look for T-shirts and turtlenecks with plenty of room in the neck, or snaps at the neck, so they slip easily over your child's head. Many parents prefer one-piece styles that snap at the crotch.
• Leggings or pull-on pants (5 to 7): Separates allow you to change one piece of dirty clothing without assembling a whole new outfit, so they're useful to have. Look for stretchy waistbands that fit easily over your baby's diaper and belly – and expand as he gains weight.
• Sweater or jacket (1): Most babies don't like having clothes pulled over their head, so warm up your baby with a sweater or jacket that buttons down the front.
• Pajamas or sleepers (4 to 7): No matter how cute it looks, avoid sleepwear that has complicated snaps or requires lots of effort to get on or off!
• Wearable blankets (2 to 3): These fleece or cotton sacks zip over your baby's sleepwear to keep him warm at night. They replace traditional blankets, which aren't safe for sleeping babies because of the risk of SIDS. You may or may not need these, depending on the climate you live in and the season when your baby's born.
• Fleecewear or snowsuits: If you have a winter baby, you may want a one-piece fleece suit to keep him warm on outings. They're often hooded and come in many styles. Another option is to avoid bulky snowsuits and slip your baby into a snug, fleece-lined stroller sack (designed to accommodate the harnesses in strollers and car seats).
• Socks and booties: You'll need lots of socks for indoors and some booties to keep your baby's feet warm when you're out and about.
• Hats (1 to 3): You'll want a broad-brimmed hat for a summer baby, or a soft, warm hat that covers the ears for a winter baby.

Tips for dressing your newborn

Avoid clothes that wrap around your baby's neck too tightly and those that have cords or ties. Check buttons, ribbons, and decorative items to make sure they're on securely – if they come off, they're a choking hazard.

When dressing your infant, make the clothes fit your baby and not the other way around. Open snaps and stretch necks wide so you can ease your baby's head through them. Reach through sleeves and legs first to help guide wiggly hands and feet. 

It's often easiest to dress your infant on the changing table or floor. Try cooing and talking to your baby as you put on each piece so he will associate getting dressed with special time with you.

NORMAL HEIGHT & WEIGHT OF NEWBORN

Most birth announcements will include the baby's height and length. And no wonder: It is vital data. Falling into the normal range for size is a good start for an infant, suggesting good health. But remember, each baby is different, and even those who fall a bit outside the normal range are usually fine nonetheless. If you have concerns about your newborn's dimensions, address them with a doctor.

AVERAGE

A typical baby delivered following a full 40-week pregnancy is between 19 and 21 inches long, according to KidsHealth.org. The average weight is between 6 pounds, 2 oz. and 9 pounds, 2 oz. Length of gestation is the most significant factor in how big your baby will be, with those born earlier tending to weigh less. Twins and higher-order multiples are generally smaller both because they are born earlier and because lack of space restricted their growth. On the part of the mother, heart problems, high blood pressure and use of alcohol or tobacco can lead to lower birth weight.

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TREND

The average size of babies born in the United States is shrinking, researchers reported in February 2010. From 1990 to 2005, the weight fell 1.83 oz. to 7 lbs., 7.54 oz. For the study, published in the journal Obstetrics & Gynecology, Sara Donahue of Boston University and her colleagues examined 37 million birth records. They have not determined a reason for the drop or what effects it may have on infant health.

EARLY GROWTH

Expect your baby's weight to decrease by 7 to 10 percent in the first few days of life as extra fluid is lost. Two weeks later, the baby will typically have regained the weight. Then, through age 6 months, your infant is likely to grow a half-inch to an inch per month and gain 5 to 7 oz. per month, according to Mayo Clinic emeritus consultant Dr. Jay L. Hoecker.

HEALTH ISSUES

The March of Dimes considers children born at less than 5 pounds, 8 ounces as having low birth weight, which accounts for 1 in 12 babies born in the United States. Potential health complications vary based on just how low the birth weight is. They include respiratory distress, bleeding of the brain and heart, intestinal problems and eye problems. Low birth-weight babies often must spend time in a neonatal intensive care unit.

TYPES

No matter your newborn's length and weight at birth, future growth will fall into a pattern based on genetics and temperament. "Banana" babies are long and lean and burn calories rapidly, according to Dr. William Sears, a physician who runs a medical-information Web site with his wife, Martha Sears, a nurse. On growth charts, they commonly fall above average on height and below average on weight. At the other end of the spectrum are "apples" and "pears." They naturally tend toward pudginess and chart lower on height. Also, babies with a high-energy personality tend to burn more calories, and thus be thinner, than mellower babies.

The Average Weight Of Infants

Babies grow up very fast. Even before you can possibly realize, they grow from a squirming helpless tiny tot to a toddler who can wreak havoc merely in the crawling stage! With time, one needs to change the dietary pattern of the baby and provide all the necessary nourishment. This results in changes in the average weight on infants. Mostly, babies lose around 5-10% of their original weight after birth. A breast-fed baby is usually heavier than a bottle-fed baby, but within the first year, they become thinner. The physical characteristics of a baby then start to develop as inherited from the parents.

 

In the first 24 months, the growth of the baby is quite rapid, thus leading to fluctuations in the weight. Thereafter, the growth stabilizes and the baby puts on weight steadily. Usually, girls tend to grow at a faster rate than boys, till they reach their teenage. On a general basis, one notices that infant increases in length by almost 30% in the first five months and by about 50% in the first year. The average weight of an infant doubles between the time of birth to five months. Till the age of one year, it increases by three times and by four times till the baby turns two.

 

Tabular Explanation

The following tables will give you an idea about the average height and weight of baby boys and girls in accordance to their age. It is not necessary that your infant's average should be exactly what is mentioned in the chart. It may differ by a couple of kilograms, depending on the body structure of an infant.

 

Average Height and Weight of Boys at Different Ages

 

Age	Weight (Kg)	Height (Cm)
Birth	3.3	50.5
3 Months	6.0	61.1
6 Months	7.8	67.8
9 Months	9.2	72.3
1 Year	10.2	76.1
2 Years	12.3	85.6
3 Years	14.6	94.9
4 Years	16.7	102.9
5 Years	18.7	109.9

 

Average Height and Weight of Girls at Different Ages

 

Age	Weight (Kg)	Height (Cm)
Birth	3.2	49.9
3 Months	5.4	60.2
6 Months	7.2	66.6
9 Months	8.6	71.1
1 Year	9.5	75.0
2 Years	11.8	84.5
3 Years	14.1	93.9
4 Years	16.0	101.6
5 Years	17.7	108.4